Remember that movie with Michael Keeton ‘Multiplicity?’ It’s one of those movies few people will admittedly remember. Chances are you’ve had it playing in the distant background as you were working around the house on a Saturday afternoon at least once in your life, if nothing else simply because it was a choice between that and “Men at Work.” The movie starred Michael Keeton and Andie McDowell. According to IMDB:
[It's] A comedy about a man who clones himself to save his marriage, and then almost loses his wife– to himself! Overworked and over-scheduled, contractor Doug Kinney never has enough time for his wife and family. So when a helpful geneticist offers to “xerox” Doug, it seems like the perfect solution– until the clones begin to take over his home, his job, and his bed.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch…Nancy Pelosi was in town last night for a fancy-pants fundraiser for Bob Lord at UofPhx founder Dr. John Sperling’s home. Sperling, who’s like 116 years old, also happens to be a big time pot proponent, having sponsored multiple marijuana legalization initiatives across the country (and many of them successful) – including right here in Arizona.
Now, a discussion regarding a revampment of America’s drug laws is something I would certainly entertain and possibly advocate for myself – if that were the point of this blog. Clearly, the War on Drugs as currently exectued is not working. How do you win a drug insurgency? Hey, I like that. It’s not a war…it’s an insurgency!
But the point is this – Lord and the local Democrat Party kept this event super secret. Why? Is Lord afraid to be tied to Nancy Pelosi? Were they afraid of being associated with Sperling and the man’s well-known hankering for the ganj? (By the way – I heard they had an amazing spread of peanut butter, ritz crackers, oreo’s, bagel bites, Chex Mix and snicker doodles for appetizers. They then proceeded to sit around the TV for 45 minutes and watch “Planet Earth” on HDTV).
Why was no media invited? Why were no invitations or emails sent out? Why wasn’t I invited? Why was there so much security at the front gate? Was the inside anything like the party Tom Cruise attended in ‘Eyes Wide Shut’ ???
I'm here for the Cheez Whiz Man!
I guess we’ll never know….
Back to Multiplicity. Sperling is also a HUGE cloning freak. Much like Tom Cruise in “Vanilla Sky”, John Sperling wants to live forever (yes, I realize that’s the second Tom Cruise reference in this post). And while opinions regarding stem cell research are split almost down the middle in this country, and one could easily argue that the issue is gaining more acceptance with every election cycle, cloning proponents are still viewed as – well, to put it mildly – weirdos. Kind of like Bob Lord.
http://www.geneticsandsociety.org/article.php?id=468
In fact, Sperling actually cloned his dog (“Missy”):
“We were talking one day, when John said, ‘Let’s clone Missy,’ ” said Hawthorne, referring to his dog, a border collie-Siberian husky mutt.
I love that quote. That’s when you know you’re obscenely rich. I can see Sperling now, sitting around the coffee table with his beatnik buddies, smoking a doobie of some killer Purple Kush, a half-eaten box of Capt’n Crunch open on the table:
“Dude, you know what would be awesome? Let’s clone Missy.”
The project was actually referred to as “Missplicity”. (You see where I’m going with this now…) I wonder if Bob Lord is a proponent of cloning? More importantly, how many Bob Lord’s would it take to equal 1 John Shadegg? I’m going to go with my gut on this one and say 4…
You know, coincidentally enough, the tagline for ‘Multiplicity’ is: Sometimes to get more out of life, you have to make more of yourself.
And that’s essentially what Bob has done. He’s taken a mediocre career, lackluster personality, one failed marriage, and now through the magic of reinvention and a makeover courtesy of the DCCC – voila! We have a well-funded Democratic Congressional candidate.
It’s the ultimate American Idol candidacy. It’s Risky Business, and you know it.
